Bam’s Alien Encounter Of The First Degree

“Bing! Bing! Bing! Billions of emails received early this morning. No one knows who to blame” The lady said on the news announcing the morning headlines. Her face had a smile painted on, hiding a dense sense of fear.

“Can you believe this shit!” I said pointing to the old 80’s Tv I had been rocking since high school. Twitch eyed me with great frustration. His cat naps were of high priority. My monologue on things of little importance to him was interrupting that.

Earlier this morning I along with billions of others around the globe. A mysterious email came through. Demanding everyone reply to the email with their unconditional surrender. The sender made sure that they remained anonymous. 

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My phone had not stopped going off since two AM. At some point in the early morning, I rolled over and shut the notifications off. This turned out to be a mistake. I glanced at the screen. As it sat on the table to see my home screen overflowing with notifications of missed calls from Amelia.

“Fuck!” Snatching the phone, I hit redial. Without taking the time to listen to any of the hundreds of voicemails she left. With each ring my anticipation grew, blossoming into a full-on panic attack. On the last ring I heard a click and then a small raspy voice whisper.

“Bam? Is that you?” Amilia has called me Bam since we were in kindergarten. She had a speech impediment and couldn’t say Amber. She settled on Bam and that has been my name ever since. Hearing her saying my name now felt foreign. Far from the warm and cozy sense that usually accompanies Amilia everywhere she goes.

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“Amilia, what happened?” The world continued to spin out of control and my head was beginning to spin. Waves of nausea crashed into me one after another. Everything transformed into a surreal dream. Amilia’s breathing becomes more ragged with every inhale. Taking more time to speak.

“They have come. Don’t accep–” The line went dead, leaving me to sit in a cacophony of static. In a panic I threw my phone into my satchel and slung it across my body. I pulled on my tall Ariat work boots over my ripped black jeans. I threw my Thick black hair in a messy cluster on top of my head, with a prayer that it would stay there. As I stepped out of my tiny studio apartment. I stepped out onto the cold, blustery city streets. I sensed that something in the air had changed, and it sent chills down my spine.

I walked a few blocks before cutting down a dark alley. The sudden relief from the blowing wind brought a much-needed boost to my speed. As I rounded that corner my bag shifted on my bag and I felt something odd bump about, accompanied by a faint meow.

“Twitch?” his tiny black head with piercing green eyes poked from the side of the satchel, staring up at me. His giant eye made anger an impossible emotion to feel when he was around. I looked down at him and gave him a mischievous smile, “I suppose you are along for the ride now, little fella.” Twitch ducked back into the satchel. Satisfied with the outcome of his mission.

We came upon an old stone building with ivy covering the face. The windows cloudy with the haze of age, chips of the past cut into the foundation. It wasn’t much to look at, but Amilia called it home. We’d filled it with many happy memories, and I had no intention of stopping anytime soon.

Twitch and I burst through the front door and made an immediate ascent up the stairs. Marching Down the hall we came to Apartment 2H. I stood in front of the door and pulled my shoulders back and took a deep breath in. Gathering all the strength I could muster.  With a firm voice and steady hand, I knocked on the old wooden door and shouted. “Amilia open the door, I know you’re in there.” To my surprise the door swung open with no resistance.

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I peered into the doorway with caution. Amilia always put up a little fight when it came to talking about feelings. An open-door policy would be a change. Looking down the hall I could see a pale light creeping towards me. My curiosity and drive to know if Amilia was okay overrode any sense of caution left. I forged forward into the aura.

Standing in the living room a strange heat producing light surrounded me. Twitch felt the seductive call of the heat. Coaxed from his hiding spot in my bag. Jumping from the satchel and landing in the middle of the room with a soft thud. As soon as twitch’s paws hit the carpet, the blue aura snatched him from the safety of the ground. dangling his tiny body in midair. He of course thought this was a wonderful event as he floated around the room. Swooping and diving, enjoying his brush with antigravity.

I snatched Twitch from the air and stuffed him back in the satchel. He poked his head out with a disapproving stare. “I don’t need you getting hurt too.” I said in a hushed tone. Looking up from the satchel I caught a shadow shifting a hair’s width outside the light’s reach. Dark holes for eyes locked on me. “What do you want?” I called out. My hands shaking as I reached into my bag groping in the dark for the small taser I keep tucked away at all times.

The figure stepped forward from the shadows and into the light. Revealing its lavender skin and long head. With Almond eyes running down the center of the creature’s head. Set deep into its skull, their movements synchronized. Taking in more details in seconds than we as humans could fathom. I knew I was going to have to be quick if I was going to be faster than a creature with four eyes.

“We are here for what is ours, dominion over simpler creatures. It is our destiny, prophesied in our Holy Book.” The irony was not lost on me and invoked a wry smile, before delivering my reply.

“Who the hell are you? You have everyone thinking we are being invaded by terrorist.” The creature scoffed and shifted its weight. Shifting from one long lanky leg to the other. Jutting out her curvaceous form.

“I am Illea, ruler of the planet Zorhavv. Our prophets have seen your planet in their prophecies as our divine inheritance. We sent out a planet wide communication. Allowing all to join us and avoid the harsh reality of the conquered.”

“Oh well then, that clears everything up thank you.” I couldn’t hold back the sarcasm anymore. I thought we had made it past this conquering people shit and here we go again. “Where is Amilia?”

“She and her friends agreed to the terms of surrender. They have been retrofitted with let’s call it new “hardware.” They will return upon the complete takeover of your planet.” Illea spoke with such precision. I thought of something mechanical rather than biological.

Amilia had thrown a bachelorette party for her brother’s fiancé the night before. Another reason I had not thought much of turning my phone to silent. She was having a great time surrounded by a bunch of others in her apartment, and Amilia wasn’t exactly a wild girl. I never thought I’d be hunting her down. Now her and a bunch of other women had gone missing. Captives of a malicious alien race.

Twitch nudged my hand. “Not now.” I whispered gazing down quickly and then back up at Illea again. As I stared back at Illea I pat the top of Twitch’s head. I realized as I looked down, he had retrieved the taser I had abandoned my search for when questioning Illea. My hand wrapped around the cool plastic. I could feel the small piece of plastic that stuck out acting as a trigger.

I began to step towards Illea. She sidestepped. A sexy tango between the heroine and villainess. I possessed an upper hand that the creature, Illea, failed to realize. Amilia’s greatest hobby is knife throwing. Amilia’s home is a menagerie of knives of all sorts stashed all around. Each one made to soar and to hit its target with deadly accuracy. As we danced around, I began to pull open drawers and toss the room apart looking for a knife so I could execute my plan.

I saw my chance. In a heart throbbing moment, I dove across the room. Knocking a side table over and spilling the contents all over the floor. From the pile of trinkets, I snatched up the glimmering knife. Hiding it in the crease of my hand, the way I learned when I was a kid on the streets.

The creature hissed. Stepping back at first. Then, as I lunged forward, in swift reaction to my action, lunged on top of me holding nothing back.  I felt the razor-sharp edges of its nails dig deep into my skin. I yelped and kicked the creature back and off of me. Pushing it off gave me enough time to pull the taser from my bag, aim and shoot. The blast stunned the creature for a second and in the second I jumped on top and stabbed it in the eye. It screeched a blood curdling wail. Even the walls trembled.

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“God Damn it “I cursed for all my quick thinking; I did not think to find anything to tie the creature up once subdued. I sat on top of it as it squirmed in agony, covering its face. From out of the shadow a time ball of black fur emerged to save the day once again.

Twitch pounced triumphant into the middle of the room. His mouth is full of zip ties. I don’t know where this feline found these to this day, but I thank the heavenly bodies he did. With a few quick zips we had secured our hostage. Now it was on to the next stage of this haphazard plan, negotiations.

I grabbed the creature by the wrists and hauled it over to Amilia’s hall closet and heaved it in. Throwing the weak carcass on top of a pile of designer shoes. I pulled out my phone and snapped a picture, proof of life, I thought.

I walked over to Amilia’s laptop. Plugged in, sitting on the end table next to the couch. Her emails were already open and up on the desktop. They wasted no time after receiving a reply to abduct her and her friends I thought with a facetious scoff. I hit reply and began typing:

To whom it may concern on planet Zorhavv,

I have Illea, your “ruler”. I will not return your ruler unless two conditions are seen to. One, you return all that you have abducted. Two, you immediately and forever vacate this solar system. If not, you and your “ruler” will face destruction.

Eternally fuck you,

Bam

I sat back and read through it. Twitch jumped up on the keyboard to proofread as cats are prone to do. He looked at the screen then at me. He cocked his head to the side and meowed. “I know I added that last part for effect. I doubt it’ll come to that, but we can’t have them thinking we are a bunch of soft cupcakes down here.” Twitch eyed me and jumped down, returning to his napping spot in the satchel. “Nothing more to do but kick back and wait.” I said as I kicked my feet up on the coffee table and leaned back, letting my eyes fall shut and the stress of the day slip away.

As I began to slip into the relief of sleep there came a ding from the computer.  My eyes flew open, and I came to an erect position, pulling the laptop onto my lap from the side table. I clicked the email tab, and the window flew open onto the desktop. There on the screen sat the reply to my direct threat of intergalactic war.

Earth Trash called Bam,

Release our leader or face the destruction of your planet.

Attached to the brief email was an attachment, I hesitated and then clicked on it. The circle of death went around for a brief moment, and I whispered a prayer to the gods please no virus. The last thing needed was an intergalactic virus shutting the infrastructure down indefinitely. That would be my luck for sure. I must be the unluckiest human on this planet and somehow the human race’s fate has landed in my hands. Making the human race the victim of my terrible luck. The attachment opened. It was a picture of a large structure that I could only assume to be a space ray. The machine had its sights pointing at a planet labeled earth.

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“Well Fuck me, the human race is screwed, Twitch. They called our bluff.” Twitch meowed his protest. “Okay MY bluff.” Twitch pranced off in indignation.

A quiet whisper from behind me flowed in the darkness. “I can be of assistance.” I whipped my head around in shock. Questioning my own sanity at that moment.

“You’re the reason we are in this mess.” I snapped as a wave of nausea crashed into me along with the realization of the burden that landed on me. This feeling has been the reason I’ve worked so hard to stay out of the spotlight. Now forced upon me, and I couldn’t let the world down.

“I believe we have made a mistake.” The voice was weak, fading in and out. “Our people value strength and intelligence and you at least have a little of that. It would be a shame to wipe what little intelligence remains out, don’t you think?” I eyed the door with suspicion, a voice deep inside nagged at me, but panic argued back. We don’t have another way out.

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Against my better judgment. I walked over to the closet door where I had imprisoned the creature, Illea. I braced myself for a possible escape as I pulled the door open with caution. To my surprise it did not rush out nor advance when the door was open. Instead, it stood motionless in the shadow of the closet. The black holes that were its eyes, darker than the darkest dark, stood out even in the shadows of the unlit closet. The skin had a slight bluish lavender tint that bore a resemblance to a slight glow. If it wasn’t trying to kill me, it would be beautiful I thought as I looked at it standing there.

“Why should I trust you, you tried to kill me.” It was a cliche question to be sure, but I had to buy time to plot my next move. Flying by the seat of my pants had its downsides at times and this was one of them.

“Again, a mistake and I don’t see you have much choice. They aren’t going to negotiate. They will pull the trigger and risk that you MIGHT have a gun.” The creature was onto us in every way. Twitch was walking circles around my ankles. I could feel his stare focused on me. I swear for a cat he seemed to be quite judgy.

It’s fair to say this is where shit gets real. I grit my teeth, close my eyes, shake my head one short shake to the left trying to digest the hard truth. I was about to make a deal with the closest thing to the devil. In an attempt to save the planet, I cleared my throat and in an assertive tone I said, “what do you have in mind?”

“I will call off the destruction of your planet. In exchange you will return to the ship with me as my personal assistant.” I stood in silence, expressionless. What was I to say to this. Leave everything I have ever known to travel space with an alien race. The other option is for me and the entire human race to find ourselves blown to smithereens. They were the last two options I thought I’d have in the world; I knew that was for sure.

“Well, geez thanks. Those are both such wonderful fucking choices. Slavery or death?” My temper was rising like the heat in the Alabama summers, and I was looking to burn and then explode. My cheeks flushed to the point of hurting; they burned so hot. I balled my hands into a fist tight. Before I had thought it through. I cocked back and punched the creature in the face knocking it back into the closet. I slammed the door and stomped away.

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“They won’t wait forever.” The creature spoke again in a composed voice. You would never know I had hauled off and knocked his head around a bit. I was starting to get the idea that the fight, the struggle, somehow energized and healed it. Noted I thought. Stay out of fights with the creatures.

“I screwed up this time.” I said looking down at Twitch. A heaviness came over me at first, like a wet blanket left out on the line in a thunderstorm. The idea of departing from Amilia, my childhood best friend. Leaving the career, I had worked so many long hard hours to achieve success in. The nostalgia and longing for the things and ones that I loved weighed heavy on me. In the back of my mind there was a twinkle of something else though. A sense of adventure stirred. Here on Earth, I am average. I blend in and maybe this is a chance to stand out, do something extraordinary.

Again, I shook my head this time in absolute disbelief at what I was about to say “Okay, Illea you have a deal. I will go with you, but only after I see the safe return of everyone you abducted. I mean returned to the state they left the earth. None of this zombie fried vegetable shit you have going on in the labs up there.”

“Oh, very well as you wish, not that it’s much of an improvement.” I raised my eyebrows and shot a glance at the door even though I knew the damn creature couldn’t see me. I knew I couldn’t show weakness not even for a moment around Illea or it could very well be my doom. “Are you going to let me out of this damn closet now?”

“Yeah, but I expect results.”

“Zorhavvians are true to their word. I will do as I said I would do. I will return your friends, and your planet left unharmed. In exchange you will return to the spaceship with me at once.”

“Alright then let’s get on with it and stop wasting time. Illea began to glow the same blue as the night before. White tattoos glowed on the skin. The room swirled as it blended into the cool blue. Everything swirled into the warm light. In the blink of an eye, we vanished from sight and reappeared in a foreign atmosphere.

I was in a large open control room. I had shrunk from being an average size being in a small apartment. To a tiny speck in an amphitheater of technology. Most far advanced from anything we had on earth. The front of the room was nothing but glass. Broken up only by lattice work scrolled out across the expanse of pristine glass.

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Clicking boot heels on the tile floor pulled me from my mesmerized trance. I looked around to see Illea standing in front of me. She cleaned up. Without a scratch on her. Her skin had taken on a soft feminine glow. She wore a long chiffon dress, and, in the light, there was no doubt Illea was not it but she.

“You didn’t think I looked like a grub all the time did you.” She said to me in a teasing tone.

“No, it’s not what I was expecting.”

“It never is.” she said with a mischievous smile.

“What about your end of the deal?”

“Oh yeah, as you wish. You heard the woman let the captives free.” The guards moved in an instant without a question. Eager to prove their undying loyalty at the flick of her thin bony wrist.

“See your precious earth lives another day.” She said pointing to a large screen hanging above the control center in the middle of the great hall. The screen displayed the captives rematerializing. Back in their beds, fast asleep and completely unaware of anything going on around them. “They won’t remember a thing. Happy?”

“This will do, so where are we off to?”

“A new system has appeared in the delta region. I have spoken to our commander. He thinks that there is a chance of undiscovered territory in that region. As my assistant and my ambassador to foreign planets, I want you at the meeting. So, for now we are off to the meeting hall and then the universe is the limit, my friend.”

“Wait ambassador to what?” Illea had already strode off across the control room. I shook my head and took off in a sprint to catch up, it was going to be a lot of work being a galactic space assistant.

Bam’s Alien Encounter of the first degree

“Bing! Bing! Bing! Billions of emails received early this morning. No one knows who to blame” The lady said on the news announcing the morning headlines. Her face had a smile painted on, hiding a dense sense of fear.

“Can you believe this shit!” I said pointing to the old 80’s Tv I had been rocking since high school. Twitch eyed me with great frustration. His cat naps were of high priority. My monologue on things of little importance to him was interrupting that.

Earlier this morning I along with billions of others around the globe. A mysterious email came through. Demanding everyone reply to the email with their unconditional surrender. The sender made sure that they remained anonymous. 

My phone had not stopped going off since two AM. At some point in the early morning, I rolled over and shut the notifications off. This turned out to be a mistake. I glanced at the screen. As it sat on the table to see my home screen overflowing with notifications of missed calls from Amelia.

“Fuck!” Snatching the phone, I hit redial. Without taking the time to listen to any of the hundreds of voicemails she left. With each ring my anticipation grew, blossoming into a full-on panic attack. On the last ring I heard a click and then a small raspy voice whisper.

“Bam? Is that you?” Amilia has called me Bam since we were in kindergarten. She had a speech impediment and couldn’t say Amber. She settled on Bam and that has been my name ever since. Hearing her saying my name now felt foreign. Far from the warm and cozy sense that usually accompanies Amilia everywhere she goes.

“Amilia, what happened?” The world continued to spin out of control and my head was beginning to spin. Waves of nausea crashed into me one after another. Everything transformed into a surreal dream. Amilia’s breathing becomes more ragged with every inhale. Taking more time to speak.

“They have come. Don’t accep–” The line went dead, leaving me to sit in a cacophony of static. In a panic I threw my phone into my satchel and slung it across my body. I pulled on my tall Ariat work boots over my ripped black jeans. I threw my Thick black hair in a messy cluster on top of my head, with a prayer that it would stay there. As I stepped out of my tiny studio apartment. I stepped out onto the cold, blustery city streets. I sensed that something in the air had changed, and it sent chills down my spine.

I walked a few blocks before cutting down a dark alley. The sudden relief from the blowing wind brought a much-needed boost to my speed. As I rounded that corner my bag shifted on my bag and I felt something odd bump about, accompanied by a faint meow.

“Twitch?” his tiny black head with piercing green eyes poked from the side of the satchel, staring up at me. His giant eye made anger an impossible emotion to feel when he was around. I looked down at him and gave him a mischievous smile, “I suppose you are along for the ride now, little fella.” Twitch ducked back into the satchel. Satisfied with the outcome of his mission.

We came upon an old stone building with ivy covering the face. The windows cloudy with the haze of age, chips of the past cut into the foundation. It wasn’t much to look at, but Amilia called it home. We’d filled it with many happy memories, and I had no intention of stopping anytime soon.

Twitch and I burst through the front door and made an immediate ascent up the stairs. Marching Down the hall we came to Apartment 2H. I stood in front of the door and pulled my shoulders back and took a deep breath in. Gathering all the strength I could muster.  With a firm voice and steady hand, I knocked on the old wooden door and shouted. “Amilia open the door, I know you’re in there.” To my surprise the door swung open with no resistance.

I peered into the doorway with caution. Amilia always put up a little fight when it came to talking about feelings. An open-door policy would be a change. Looking down the hall I could see a pale light creeping towards me. My curiosity and drive to know if Amilia was okay overrode any sense of caution left. I forged forward into the aura.

Standing in the living room a strange heat producing light surrounded me. Twitch felt the seductive call of the heat. Coaxed from his hiding spot in my bag. Jumping from the satchel and landing in the middle of the room with a soft thud. As soon as twitch’s paws hit the carpet, the blue aura snatched him from the safety of the ground. dangling his tiny body in midair. He of course thought this was a wonderful event as he floated around the room. Swooping and diving, enjoying his brush with antigravity.

I snatched Twitch from the air and stuffed him back in the satchel. He poked his head out with a disapproving stare. “I don’t need you getting hurt too.” I said in a hushed tone. Looking up from the satchel I caught a shadow shifting a hair’s width outside the light’s reach. Dark holes for eyes locked on me. “What do you want?” I called out. My hands shaking as I reached into my bag groping in the dark for the small taser I keep tucked away at all times.

The figure stepped forward from the shadows and into the light. Revealing its lavender skin and long head. With Almond eyes running down the center of the creature’s head. Set deep into its skull, their movements synchronized. Taking in more details in seconds than we as humans could fathom. I knew I was going to have to be quick if I was going to have to be quick if I was going to be faster than a creature with four eyes.

“We are here for what is ours, dominion over simpler creatures. It is our destiny, prophesied in our Holy Book.” The irony was not lost on me and invoked a wyred smile, before delivering my reply.

“Who the hell are you? You have everyone thinking we are being invaded by terrorist.” The creature scoffed and shifted its weight. Shifting from one long lanky leg to another jetting out her curvaceous form.

“I am Illea, ruler of the planet Zorhavv. Our prophets have seen your planet in their prophecies as our divine inheritance. We sent out a planet wide communication. Allowing all to join us and avoid the harsh reality of the conquered.”

“Oh well then, that clears everything up thank you.” I couldn’t hold back the sarcasm anymore. I thought we had made it past this conquering people shit and here we go again. “Where is Amilia?”

“She and her friends agreed to the terms of surrender. They have been retrofitted with let’s call it new “hardware.” They will return upon the complete takeover of your planet.” Illea spoke with such precision. I thought of something mechanical rather than biological.

Amilia had thrown a bachelorette party for her brother’s fiancé the night before. Another reason I had not thought much of turning my phone to silent. She was having a great time surrounded by a bunch of others in her apartment, and Amilia wasn’t exactly a wild girl. I never thought I’d be hunting her down. Now her and a bunch of other women had gone missing. Captives of a malicious alien race.

Twitch nudged my hand. “Not now.” I whispered gazing down quickly and then back up at Illea again. As I stared back at Illea I pat the top of Twitch’s head. I realized as I looked down, he had retrieved the taser I had abandoned my search for when questioning Illea. My hand wrapped around the cool plastic. I could feel the small piece of plastic that stuck out acting as a trigger.

I began to step towards Illea. She sidestepped. A sexy tango between the heroine and villainess. I possessed an upper hand that the creature, Illea, failed to realize. Amilia’s greatest hobby is knife throwing. Amilia’s home is a menagerie of knives of all sorts stashed all around. Each one made to soar and to hit its target with deadly accuracy. As we danced around, I began to pull open drawers and toss the room apart looking for a knife so I could execute my plan.

I saw my chance. In a heart throbbing moment, I dove across the room. Knocking a side table over and spilling the contents all over the floor. From the pile of trinkets, I snatched up the glimmering knife. Hiding it in the crease of my hand, the way I learned when I was a kid on the streets.

The creature hissed. Stepping back at first. Then, as I lunged forward, in swift reaction to my action, lunged on top of me holding nothing back.  I felt the razor-sharp edges of its nails dig deep into my skin. I yelped and kicked the creature back and off of me. Pushing it off gave me enough time to pull the taser from my bag, aim and shoot. The blast stunned the creature for a second and in the second I jumped on top and stabbed it in the eye. It screeched a blood curdling wail. Even the walls trembled.

“God Damn it “I cursed for all my quick thinking; I did not think to find anything to tie the creature up once subdued. I sat on top of it as it squirmed in agony, covering its face. From out of the shadow a time ball of black fur emerged to save the day once again.

Twitch pounced triumphant into the middle of the room. His mouth is full of zip ties. I don’t know where this feline found these to this day, but I thank the heavenly bodies he did. With a few quick zips we had secured our hostage. Now it was on to the next stage of this haphazard plan, negotiations.

I grabbed the creature by the wrists and hauled it over to Amilia’s hall closet and heaved it in. Throwing the weak carcass on top of a pile of designer shoes. I pulled out my phone and snapped a picture, proof of life, I thought.

I walked over to Amilia’s laptop. Plugged in, sitting on the end table next to the couch. Her emails were already open and up on the desktop. They wasted no time after receiving a reply to abduct her and her friends I thought with a facetious scoff. I hit reply and began typing:

To whom it may concern on planet Zorhavv,

I have Illea, your “ruler”. I will not return your ruler unless two conditions are seen to. One, you return all that you have abducted. Two, you immediately and forever vacate this solar system. If not, you and your “ruler” will face destruction.

Eternally fuck you,

Bam

I sat back and read through it. Twitch jumped up on the keyboard to proofread as cats are prone to do. He looked at the screen then at me. He cocked his head to the side and meowed. “I know I added that last part for effect. I doubt it’ll come to that, but we can’t have them thinking we are a bunch of soft cupcakes down here.” Twitch eyed me and jumped down, returning to his napping spot in the satchel. “Nothing more to do but kick back and wait.” I said as I kicked my feet up on the coffee table and leaned back, letting my eyes fall shut and the stress of the day slip away.

As I began to slip into the relief of sleep there came a ding from the computer.  My eyes flew open, and I came to an erect position, pulling the laptop onto my lap from the side table. I clicked the email tab, and the window flew open onto the desktop. There on the screen sat the reply to my direct threat of intergalactic war.

Earth Trash called Bam,

Release our leader or face the destruction of your planet.

Attached to the brief email was an attachment, I hesitated and then clicked on it. The circle of death went around for a brief moment, and I whispered a prayer to the gods please no virus. The last thing needed was an intergalactic virus shutting the infrastructure down indefinitely. That would be my luck for sure. I must be the unluckiest human on this planet and somehow the human race’s fate has landed in my hands. Making the human race the victim of my terrible luck. The attachment opened. It was a picture of a large structure that I could only assume to be a space ray. The machine had its sights pointing at a planet labeled earth.

“Well Fuck me, the human race is screwed, Twitch. They called our bluff.” Twitch meowed his protest. “Okay MY bluff.” Twitch pranced off in indignation.

A quiet whisper from behind me flowed in the darkness. “I can be of assistance.” I whipped my head around in shock. Questioning my own sanity at that moment.

“You’re the reason we are in this mess.” I snapped as a wave of nausea crashed into me along with the realization of the burden that landed on me. This feeling has been the reason I’ve worked so hard to stay out of the spotlight. Now forced upon me, and I couldn’t let the world down.

“I believe we have made a mistake.” The voice was weak, fading in and out. “Our people value strength and intelligence and you at least have a little of that. It would be a shame to wipe what little intelligence remains out, don’t you think?” I eyed the door with suspicion, a voice deep inside nagged at me, but panic argued back. We don’t have another way out.

Against my better judgment. I walked over to the closet door where I had imprisoned the creature, Illea. I braced myself for a possible escape as I pulled the door open with caution. To my surprise it did not rush out nor advance when the door was open. Instead, it stood motionless in the shadow of the closet. The black holes that were its eyes, darker than the darkest dark, stood out even in the shadows of the unlit closet. The skin had a slight bluish lavender tint that bore a resemblance to a slight glow. If it wasn’t trying to kill me, it would be beautiful I thought as I looked at it standing there.

“Why should I trust you, you tried to kill me.” It was a cliche question to be sure, but I had to buy time to plot my next move. Flying by the seat of my pants had its downsides at times and this was one of them.

“Again, a mistake and I don’t see you have much choice. They aren’t going to negotiate. They will pull the trigger and risk that you MIGHT have a gun.” The creature was onto us in every way. Twitch was walking circles around my ankles. I could feel his stare focused on me. I swear for a cat he seemed to be quite judgy.

It’s fair to say this is where shit gets real. I grit my teeth, close my eyes, shake my head one short shake to the left trying to digest the hard truth. I was about to make a deal with the closest thing to the devil. In an attempt to save the planet, I cleared my throat and in an assertive tone I said, “what do you have in mind?”

“I will call off the destruction of your planet. In exchange you will return to the ship with me as my personal assistant.” I stood in silence, expressionless. What was I to say to this. Leave everything I have ever known to travel space with an alien race. The other option is for me and the entire human race to find ourselves blown to smithereens. They were the last two options I thought I’d have in the world; I knew that was for sure.

“Well, geez thanks. Those are both such wonderful fucking choices. Slavery or death?” My temper was rising like the heat in the Alabama summers, and I was looking to burn and then explode. My cheeks flushed to the point of hurting; they burned so hot. I balled my hands into a fist tight. Before I had thought it through. I cocked back and punched the creature in the face knocking it back into the closet. I slammed the door and stomped away.

“They won’t wait forever.” The creature spoke again in a composed voice. You would never know I had hauled off and knocked his head around a bit. I was starting to get the idea that the fight, the struggle, somehow energized and healed it. Noted I thought. Stay out of fights with the creatures.

“I screwed up this time.” I said looking down at Twitch. A heaviness came over me at first, like a wet blanket left out on the line in a thunderstorm. The idea of departing from Amilia, my childhood best friend. Leaving the career, I had worked so many long hard hours to achieve success in. The nostalgia and longing for the things and ones that I loved weighed heavy on me. In the back of my mind there was a twinkle of something else though. A sense of adventure stirred. Here on Earth, I am average. I blend in and maybe this is a chance to stand out, do something extraordinary.

Again, I shook my head this time in absolute disbelief at what I was about to say “Okay, Illea you have a deal. I will go with you, but only after I see the safe return of everyone you abducted. I mean returned to the state they left the earth. None of this zombie fried vegetable shit you have going on in the labs up there.”

“Oh, very well as you wish, not that it’s much of an improvement.” I raised my eyebrows and shot a glance at the door even though I knew the damn creature couldn’t see me. I knew I couldn’t show weakness not even for a moment around Illea or it could very well be my doom. “Are you going to let me out of this damn closet now?”

“Yeah, but I expect results.”

“Zorhavvians are true to their word. I will do as I said I would do. I will return your friends, and your planet left unharmed. In exchange you will return to the spaceship with me at once.”

“Alright then let’s get on with it and stop wasting time. Illea began to glow the same blue as the night before. White tattoos glowed on the skin. The room swirled as it blended into the cool blue. Everything swirled into the warm light. In the blink of an eye, we vanished from sight and reappeared in a foreign atmosphere.

I was in a large open control room. I had shrunk from being an average size being in a small apartment. To a tiny speck in an amphitheater of technology. Most far advanced from anything we had on earth. The front of the room was nothing but glass. Broken up only by lattice work scrolled out across the expanse of pristine glass.

Clicking boot heels on the tile floor pulled me from my mesmerized trance. I looked around to see Illea standing in front of me. She cleaned up. Without a scratch on her. Her skin had taken on a soft feminine glow. She wore a long chiffon dress, and, in the light, there was no doubt Illea was not it but she.

“You didn’t think I looked like a grub all the time did you.” She said to me in a teasing tone.

“No, it’s not what I was expecting.”

“It never is.” she said with a mischievous smile.

“What about your end of the deal?”

“Oh yeah, as you wish. You heard the woman let the captives free.” The guards moved in an instant without a question. Eager to prove their undying loyalty at the flick of her thin bony wrist.

“See your precious earth lives another day.” She said pointing to a large screen hanging above the control center in the middle of the great hall. The screen displayed the captives rematerializing. Back in their beds, fast asleep and completely unaware of anything going on around them. “They won’t remember a thing. Happy?”

“This will do, so where are we off to?”

“A new system has appeared in the delta region. I have spoken to our commander. He thinks that there is a chance of undiscovered territory in that region. As my assistant and my ambassador to foreign planets, I want you at the meeting. So, for now we are off to the meeting hall and then the universe is the limit, my friend.”

“Wait ambassador to what?” Illea had already strode off across the control room. I shook my head and took off in a sprint to catch up, it was going to be a lot of work being a galactic space assistant.

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